What does a goal have to do with increasing your self-esteem? Well to answer this question fully we need to find out what a goal is.
First and foremost a goal is a promise to do something in a future. The promise is – “I promise to complete (X) goal by (Y) date.”
The interesting thing about this is most people do not consider a goal a promise. You see it’s a particular kind of promise. Whether you make the promise to someone else, it’s a promise to yourself.
What happens when someone breaks a promise to you? You don’t feel so good about them? Right? If they continue to break their promises to you, you begin to not trust them. In time you either say they’re a blow hard or worse you want nothing to do with them. Trust and self-esteem are interrelated when this happens. Now let’s add incompletions to the mix.
Consider all the goals you said you were going to do and never started and/or the goals you never completed. Having goals in this state of limbo can have a negative effect on you. This is a perfect opportunity for your internal negative self-talk to pop up and start beating you up for not delivering on your promises.
Incompletions affect your self-esteem. Why? You start to lose trust in yourself accept you can’t have nothing to do with them . . . because you are them.
So here is a great exercise.
Before you begin make a commitment to yourself to not accuse or judge yourself. Realize you’re gathering information. Above all do the work.
List as many incompletions in your life as you can remember. This may help you decide what you want to take on next. This may be a new goal you want to work on during the coming week, month and/or year. By listing them you begin the process of cleaning and clearing them up. Here’s how you clean and clear the remaining incompletions.
Forgive yourself meaning it’s OK to move forward with a new commitment to do the best you can to complete you next goal. Forgive yourself and commit to learning what it takes to start and complete a goal in order to get a result you want to have in your life. You’re going to watch if and when you hit the wall over the coming weeks.
Experience where difficulties arise and what you might do differently in the future to reach your goals.
Now let the incompletions go! Give them up! Time to move on and start anew.
When you are able to complete some of the incompletions, you’ll begin to trust yourself again. As you trust yourself more, notice how good you feel. Watch how your sense of self-worth and self-esteem increase. When your self-esteem is in order you can’t help but feel powerful. Stand in your power and brilliance. Time to knock down a new goal.
Remember, it’s all good.